


SYNCHRONICITY [Erwin Smith x Reader]

by Enoughofthefoolishness



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Dragon! AU, Enemies to Lovers, Erwin has been through it, F/M, Fantasy, I'm Bad At Summaries, Politics, The reader has been through it too, fantasy!au, plot heavy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:01:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28755555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enoughofthefoolishness/pseuds/Enoughofthefoolishness
Summary: He sat there, cerulean eyes stormy and dark with anger. He looked menacing in the dim lights. The shadows from the rain danced on the skin of his face as he swirled the drink in his hand.“I take it the talk with The King didn’t go that well?”He ignored you.“You can say he’s an asshole. I won’t tell, Promise.” You pushed on, a smirk growing on your face.“It will do you well to watch your words around me, Miss [Name].” Erwin’s deep voice startled you as he finally broke his silence. “Despite how I feel at the moment, I am still loyal to The King.”Your smirk slowly dwindled. It took you everything to not roll your eyes. “You’re loyal to the people. Not the King.” He glanced up at you.“Is there a relevant difference?”“Your heart yearns and cares for the people. However, they look towards The King as a source of hope.” You walked over to your room, stopping right before the doorframe. You looked over your shoulder.“If their opinion of him changed, you wouldn’t hesitate to slay the King.”*****A broken commander whose life is no longer his own.An amnesiac girl who no longer remember hers.
Relationships: Erwin Smith/Reader
Comments: 10
Kudos: 85





	1. 1 - LOOKING FOR YOU IN THE SEA

**Chapter 1 - LOOKING FOR YOU IN THE SEA**

The expedition was going well.

A little too well.

The blonde-haired man glanced at his tired squad. They looked like they were about fall off the very horse they were riding on. The man’s full eyebrow quirked at the sight. It would be almost amusing if they weren’t in the circumstances they were in. The man, who happened to be the Commander, glided his sharp irises over his surroundings.

Tall, slender, and pitch black trees surrounded them. They stretched towards the heavens, seemingly curtained by the thick and low hanging fog. The wind blew lazily, lowering the temperature in the already low-degree frost. The blonde man regretted not holding off the expedition for a few more days. The cold made one sleepy, prone to attack. That isn’t even taking into account the setting sun. His blue orbs darted from his left to his right in a calculating fashion. It was quiet, save for the horse feet clobbering and the occasional sigh from his fellow soldiers. It was way too silent for his liking. The atmosphere was sharp and unpredictable. The enemy could strike out of nowhere and surround the army.

They’ve done it before.

He clenched his jaw at the thought.

“Oi, Erwin,” A familiar voice said from behind him, his voice stained with irritation.

Erwin turned his head slightly to the side to indicate he was listening.

“How long are we going to be riding in this shitty forest?” The voice said monotonically. The Commander turned to look at his comrade, who’s silver gaze was already locked into a harsh glare. He took no offense to the expression, though. He knew his comrade’s face was naturally angry.

“Until we find what we’re looking for.” The blonde commander replied simply. “We need to know if it’s possible to take back this district.” Strands of his golden hair flowed in the wind as he turned to look at his troops.

“We won’t find anything if we’re all collapsed from exhaustion.” Levi quipped lowly. “What exactly do you have planned, Smith?”

“Dragons are loud and destructive. If there are any nearby we would know.” He replied. “In addition to that, we have skilled alchemists on standby should we come face-to-face with the enemy. I have a plan, Captain. All I ask is for you to trust me.”

A few seconds passed before Levi responded. “Tch.”

Silence fell on the group of soldiers once more. The Commander took this time to glance behind him at his troops. Levi was right, they did look drained. Most of his soldiers cheeks were sunken with bags hanging heavy below their eyes. Even one of his section commanders, Hange, who was usually bouncing off the walls with energy, was strangely calm. She was staring down at the back of her horse's neck. It was no coincidence they looked like this. They had been scouring the forest for days now. Partly to find deers, rabbits and such to kill (as they were running low on food) but mostly as a means to expand human territory. Erwin had preferred not to enter the ominous looking forest, but it seemed more tactical to search in a place of covering.

He clenched his jaw and furrowed his brows. This wouldn’t do at all.

“I understand that you all are tired,” The commander started, gaining the attention of his somnolent soldiers. “In fact, I commend you, all of you, for holding out this far. However, it isn’t wise to stay in this forest for much longer. Believe me, men. We will rest soon. For now we must keep moving. Though it may offer us protection, we are blind and susceptible to an ambush once we leave it.”

An orchestra of tired sighs and lazy ‘yes sir’s filled the air. Erwin nodded in finality before turning back to his front. He was feeling exhausted as well, he wasn’t exempt in the slightest. But he was the Commander. He had to set an example.

Erwin heard the clobbering of hooves from behind him, only slowing down once it was right besides the commander.

He glanced to his side, bright irises landing on a blonde haired man with a look of stone on his face.

“Miche,” Erwin acknowledged.

“Commander.” He replied. “Our men are tired, and so are the horses. We don’t know how much longer they’ll last.” He started. “I don’t mean to disregard your worries, but we cannot fight the enemy if we are all on our last leg either.”

Erwin looked at him. He was right.

The commander let out a slight sigh.

“You’re right.” He concluded. Miche nodded at him before returning back to his place. Erwin signaled for his horse to stop and turn around to face his troops.

The soldiers looked back at him in confusion.

“It has come to my attention just how much fatigue has its grasp on us. I’ve decided it would be better to take our rest now rather than later.” He announced. Erwin chuckled in amusement to himself upon hearing the cheers from his soldiers.

“We’ll find a place to lay our heads, with close proximity to a body of water, preferably... We rest for a couple of hours before getting back on the trail. We need to meet up with the second and third squads before sunrise.”

*****

It didn’t take long for them to find a clearing. The land itself was scarce of trees, and the little trees it did have circled what could be called a mini lake. It was a serene environment, Erwin had to admit. He swung his leg over his horse’s back, finally granting relief to the hooved animal. He ran his fingers through the thick dark mane of the horse before releasing her to get a drink from the lake.

The Commander walked towards his fleet who were already setting up camp. Most of the soldiers didn’t bother taking off their uniform before collapsing on the ground in exhaustion. Erwin raised a brow on this. He settled on a rock, bending over to take off his boots.

“How long are we going to stay here?” Levi’s voice rang from behind him. The blonde man turned to face the shorter ravenette.

“First you ask how much longer until break. Now you’re asking how long said break is?” The commander asked.

The shorter man clicked his tongue. “I don’t want to be in the middle of counting fucking sheep before you tell us to keep moving.” He said, crossing his arms.

“I suppose you better get to it, then.”

Levi turned to leave the blonde man in silence before glancing at him again.

“And what about you, eyebrows? You’re not going to get some rest?”

Erwin gave the man a smile. “Unfortunately, someone has to be awake to alert the others of danger should it fall upon us.”

Levi blinked at him. “Don’t be a fucking idiot. We can’t have a sleep deprived commander.”

“Would you like to keep watch then, Captain?”

At that, Levi turned away from him. “You know what? A few less hours of sleep never killed anyone. Good luck, Commander.”

Erwin smiled in amusement at his friend’s retreating form before turning his attention to the lake. Not only the horses were eagerly drinking water, but so too was a handful of soldiers cupping the clear liquid in their hands.

Suddenly, the horses neighed in contempt and took a couple steps back from the water. The soldiers did the same, scrambling back from the lake in what looked to be fear and a twinge of surprise.

Erwin furrowed his eyes at this, getting up from the rock he was sitting on.

“What?”

“There’s something in the water!” One of the men exclaimed.

The commander looked at the men as if they had grown two heads.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Something is in the water, damnit!”

It was when Erwin saw with his own eyes the water of the lake moving as if something was desperately trying to reach the surface did he believe his comrades. Erwin’s eyes became sharp and alert. An enemy attack? How had they managed to get here before his soldiers? How had they managed to get in position without them knowing? The last time he had checked, Titans couldn’t swim. His large hand instantly reached to his side, grasping the familiar handle of his sword. Without a second thought, he drew his weapon from the sheath. His fingers tightened around the rough handle as he slowly made his way towards the edge of the water.

“Erwin!” He heard Miche call from behind him in a warning tone.

“Stay back!” He commanded. “This could be an ambush!”

The sharp embrace of your gelid surrounding covered you. It was so, so cold. Were you dead? Was this the afterlife? You groggily opened your eyes, only to find there was no difference between your eyelids blinding you or the inky darkness that surrounded you. What was happening? Where were you?

You slowly gained self awareness of your body. You weren’t standing on anything. Floating was the more accurate description of posturing. You tried to move your arms, only to cringe sharply. Soreness made itself known through your shoulder joints. Your arms felt like they were tied down by weights. The same went for your legs.

Grogginess entendres your being once again. You were so tired. Obviously, I won’t be able to move much, you thought bitterly. I’ll just need to rest my eyes. Then I’ll think of a plan. Slowly but surely, your eyelids started to sink over your exhausted orbs.

“[Name]! Come on! Don’t forget about the plan!”

A male voice echoed in your head. The tone of the voice sounded desperate, pleading. Your eyes snapped open. Oh yeah, the plan. You needed to meet up with...who again? One of their names started with an ‘M’, you were sure. Martian? Marcello? Mark...Marco!

You needed to meet up with Marco! As if you had regained half your strength back, you frantically removed your arms around, desperately trying to grab hold of something. A strange sound echoed dully in your ears whenever you moved. Your eyebrows furrowed in irritation as you let out a frustrated sigh. You paused. There was that sound again. However, the noise sounded different, sharper, somehow. It sounded like… bubbles?

Your eyebrows furrowed even more. Now that you were thinking about it, your chest felt heavy, like the weights that were previously on your arms and legs gathered itself on your heart. You felt your heartbeat hammer in your chest. You tried to take in a breath, but only bitter pain was given to you. That, and a mouthful of water.

Your eyes widened as the realization hit you.

You were drowning.

You let out a strangled cry as you frantically tried to swim upwards. What if you were upside down? What was the correct direction? You continued to swim upwards, your head becoming lightheaded from the lack of oxygen. Tears pricked at your eyes. You couldn’t die yet! Please, for the love of the walls, you couldn’t die!

Your arms and legs felt like they were on fire as you desperately pumped them. After what seemed like an eternity, you felt your fingertips broke the surface. Relief flooded your being as you quickly caught hold of land. It was muddy, almost making your hands slip back into the lake. You gritted your teeth. You weren’t going down that easily. With a battle cry, you pulled yourself out of the grips of the water.

The cool air caressed your wet skin as you emerged from the water. Your hair clung to your neck and skin, causing your skin to pucker up in goosebumps. You frantically took in large gulps of air, coughing every so often. Your throat still somehow felt confined. You grabbed at your neck, feeling as if you were being choked from the inside out.

Without warning, strong hands came down in your shoulders. You jumped violently, trying your hardest to get away from the person touching you. Before you knew it, you were staring into the most intense pair of cyan eyes you had ever seen. Even with your vision blurry, their gaze still managed to cut deep into you.

“It’s alright,” You heard a deep voice say, presumably from the person with the blue eyes. His voice was firm, commanding respect and exuding authority. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

You blinked harshly, failing to clear your vision. Who was touching you? You felt a droplet of water fall from your hairline down the curve of your nose as you struggled to breathe.

“Can you tell me your name?” The man asked in a more pressing tone.

You looked at the man in confusion. Your name? That’s when you felt it. Something squirming in your throat. Your hand immediately shot upto your trachea. Turning from the man, you hacked violently.

“She’s choking!” The man announced. Who was he talking to? Was there more people?

Strong arms circles your waist, forcing you back against a hard chest. Before you could question what was going on, the arms pulled against your stomach.

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

Like some magic spell, the thing stuck in your throat came loose and emerged from your mouth, flopping on the ground. 

It was a tiny fish.

You looked at it horrified.

“Walls have mercy,” You heard the man mumble from behind you. You turned to him, your head spinning. 

“Marco,” you rasped out. “Where is he? Tell me where he is!” Had he abandoned you? Had he really left without you? You felt your heart rate increase as you began to hyperventilate. 

The man grabbed a hold of your shoulders again.

“Miss, calm down—“

“I have to find him! We need to leave!”

“Miss, I am trying to help you. What is your name?”

“I—“ 

Your words were cut off as you felt your mind go blank. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you felt your body jerk violently.

“She’s seizing!” You heard the man cry out, though his voice sounded muffled like he was the one underwater. “Someone get the medics!”

His voice was the last sound you heard before your world went black.

****

_The sound of leaves being crushed under trampling feet filled your senses. You were looking down at your worn flats. You wanted to move, to follow him, but your legs seemed fixed in place. Your chest felt like it was tightening every time you let out a shaky breath. Dread and fear washed over your body like dememted waterfalls, holding you in it’s tight grip. You hated this feeling. You hated being frozen to the spot due to your own meekness, yet how could you resist the growing foreboding pang in the pit of your stomach? You were so far away from the walls…_

_The retreating footsteps suddenly stopped. A loud sigh came from the person in front of you before they ran towards your direction. Two strong hands came down on your shoulders. You let out a strangled yelp before looking up. Your eyes connected with a pair of honey brown irises, full of determination and concern. The man in front of you had soft looking dark brown hair that was parted in the middle, falling in dark tresses on his forehead. His pale skin was dusted with freckles, giving him a boyish look._

_“Marco,” You breathed, your voice trembling and barely above a whisper. You were sure he would be fed up with your hesitant nature, but those beautiful eyes of his only reflected patience._

_“We sh-should turn back, this is-isn’t safe--”_

_“We can’t turn back now, [Name]. Not after everything that’s happened!” He interrupted. “People are waiting for us, Remember?”_

_“Surely this cannot be the only way,” You pleaded, taking his wrists within your hands. You felt tears well up at the corner of your eyes._

_“[Name], I understand that you are scared. I am too. We all are.” He started, furrowing his thin brows. “Even if we wanted to go back, we couldn’t. The King would have our heads, do you understand me?”_

_Your lips trembled as you struggled to hold back the tears that were threatening to burst from your tear ducts. You nodded meekly. He gave you a comforting smile._

_“Good. Let’s go. We have a long journey ahead of us.”_

  
  


Your eyes opened slowly. 

_‘Oh, right._ ’ You thought to yourself groggily. The memory that disguised itself as a dream replayed over and played in your mind. Your tongue darted out to wet the dry, cracked skin that was your lips. Your eyelids opened and closed in a disoriented blink. Where was the man in your memories? The remembrance of your time in the cold lake came back to you in snappy visions. The coldness that made a chill run up your spine, the suffocating yet calm waters, the loneliness…

Yes, during the period you had made that embarrassing display of hysteria, you were alone. Marco was nowhere to be found. You paused as the rest of the memory of the lake downloaded themselves into your mind. You recalled there being other people there, a multitude, if your memory was to be trusted. You remembered someone talking to you in a deep yet firm voice. 

It wasn’t Marco’s.

Your tired [Eye Color] orbs slowly took in their surroundings. Brown stones and bricks made up the small room you were in. The lighting was slight, and golden in color… like it was coming from a flame. ‘ _Candlelight?’_ You asked yourself. You shifted closer to the heat surrounding you. It was almost as if the frost had made its life goal to cling to your being every waking moment you had. You let out a hiss, shivering violently under the thin covers around you. You looked down, ignoring the creak from your bones. 

A long-sleeved, oversized, white button up veiled your bare body. The shirt itself almost touched your knees. The same sized black slacks covered your legs, though it had sunken off your waist and to the middle of your arse. You frowned before pulling them up. Using the small strength you had, you pushed yourself up from what appeared to be a small cot kept steady by rusting chains. You let out another hiss as a sharp pain shot through your palms and side. You furrowed your brows. Where were you?

“Commander! Our little mermaid is awake!” an energetic voice exclaimed. You cringed at her volume, slowly looking up. Your eyes widened slightly at what you saw. Bars made of iron and stone caged you in the room you were in. _‘Have I been apprehended?_ ’ You thought, your panic rising with each passing second. You swallowed a large lump that was in your throat.

Outside the bars were two people. The smaller of the two was a black haired man. He wore his hair in a dark undercut, which was parted at the side. His silver eyes were fixed on you with a look of suspicion, uninterest and slight disgust. You shivered. The other one was a woman with unkempt hair thrown lazily in a high ponytail. She wore thick rimmed glasses and was giving you a wide grin.The both of them wore a black buttoned up blazer with a white slash going across their torso. On their chests sat what looked to be military decorations. A white collar poked out from above their blazers, along with a dark tie that was tucked inside of it. Their hands were covered in white gloves and black slacks covered their legs. A red and black cape covered their shoulders. 

You felt your blood turn to ice. Those were _military_ uniforms. More specifically _high status_ military.

Your dread only increased when a man taller than both the man and woman stepped into the room. You knew he was high ranking as his mere presence commanded respect. He had a large stature, easily reaching at _least_ six feet. His golden hair was parted neatly at the side and styled in an undercut, just like the ravenette. You remembered that the style was quite popular among men within the walls. His nose was sharp and Romanesque, leading to a pair of plump pink lips. He was handsome, you had to admit. His eyes caught you off guard.

The same ones that you were looking into by the lake.

You lowered your gaze from him, intimidated.

“I’m glad you’re awake. You’ve been unconscious for days now.” The same deep and firm voice from your memories echoed inside the room. You turned your head, clenching your jaw. ‘ _Keep calm, [Name].’_ you repeat to yourself.

“My name is Commander Erwin Smith.” He introduced himself. You glanced up at him. He gestured to the woman beside him. “This is Section Commander and Lead Alchemist Dr. Hange Zoë,” Her grin only seemed to get wider. “And this is Lance Corporal Levi Ackerman.” He finished, gesturing to the black haired man glaring at you. You bit the inside of your cheek. What was his problem?

  
  


“Would you mind telling us your name?” He asked gently, as if you were a kid.

You gulped again. In that moment, a million thoughts ran through your hair. Should you tell him your real name? You were already caught, could it really do more harm than good? Disregarding your chaotic thoughts, your voice sounded on its own. 

“Emery.” You lied effortlessly. 

Your voice came out groggy and gravely. “My name is Emery.” You had no idea where the name came from. You didn’t know anyone with it. You internally cringed. It probably wasn’t the best of fake names. The Commander, Erwin, tilted his head ever so slightly when he heard your name. He opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by the alchemist.

“Emery, yes? What were you doing in the lake way outside the walls? It’s a miracle you haven’t caught hypothermia!” She started, walking closer to your cell. You pushed yourself closer to the stone behind you.

“Uh--”

“The average time a human being can spend without oxygen is about a minute thirty to two minutes. You were in the lake before we arrived, that’s about five minutes! Tell me, Emery, How did you pull that off?”

“I d-don’t know, luck?--”

“Speaking of the lake, you had burns all over your hands and side like you were defending yourself from a dragon! Did you encounter one? If so, what type was it? Color? Size--”

“Shut the hell up, Shitty glasses. Can’t you see you’re scaring her?” Levi spoke up.

Dragons? _Burns_? 

You looked down at your palms only to find bandages around your wrists and hands. You had little doubt there weren’t bandages on your side as well.

“I’m sorry, the whole situation is just so interesting!” She quipped, her glasses glinting in the candle light. The two bickered while the commander’s eyes remained on you. His gaze was scary, like he was reading you like an open book. 

“Captain, Dr. Zoë, could you give us a moment?” He said finally. 

The Alchemist groaned dramatically and the Captain clicked his tongue. 

“Fine, but I call dibs on questioning her next!” The brown haired woman cried before she was eventually pushed out by the smaller ravenette.

You raised your eyebrow at the two before turning back to the handsome man.

“Did you change me?” You croaked.

“I did.” He responded, clasping his gloved hands in front of himself. You paused at that. Heat rose to your face in a shameful blush as you glared at him. ‘ _Typical military,’_ You growled in your head. ‘ _Always eager to take advantage of a woman!’_ Anger slowly rose in your chest, clawing its way to your tongue. What did he see? Were you completely bare as he was changing you? 

Did he try anything? 

You opened your mouth to give him a piece of your mind when he spoke up again. “More accurately, I had one of the female nurses change you. I have no interest in violating you in such a crude manner, if that’s what you were thinking.”

You slowly closed your mouth before playing with your fingers, wincing softly at the slight pain it brought you.

“What were you doing outside the walls, Emery?” He asked in a firm tone. “You were nowhere near them. We found you deep in titan territory.”

“...I don’t remember.” You echoed hesitantly. 

His striking eyes narrowed. He was onto you, you knew he was. You felt a bead of sweat run down your back. You weren’t even looking at him but you could _tell_ his gaze grew harder. Damn, he was intimidating. 

“Who is Marco? Is he your husband? Lover?” Your ears perked at the sound of his name. He wasn’t your husband, that you knew. You were well aware that you were at the age of getting married, but Marco was just a dear friend.

“No. We aren’t married.”

“He was the first one you cried out for when you emerged from the lake. Where is he, _Emery_?” He said your “name” in an accusery way.

“I don’t know.” 

Silence reigned for a couple of seconds.

“You can’t leave this place until you are honest with me.”

You glared at the handsome man in front of you. “I’m answering your questions, aren’t I?” you snapped.

Without missing a beat, he pulled out a document from his breast pocket and held it out for you to see. Your eyes widened when you saw the contents of the paper.

It was a missing poster. A well drawn image of you sat boldly on the front.

But how--?

“Your name, your _real_ name, is [Name][Last Name]. You are twenty-two years old and you went three months ago. The clothes you were in before you were changed held material that was only native to the colonies of Maria. Your accent betrays you well.”

Your mouth fell agape. Accent? Shit, why didn’t you think of covering it? 

“The first thing you did when you emerged from the lake was call for ‘Marco’, not ‘help’. This led me to believe that you weren’t taken from the walls, rather, you left willingly. Disregarding the fact that it takes military personnel to enter through and exit out of the gates, you were retrieved from titan territory with nothing but a couple of burns and scratches. Not only that, you lied to a military commander which is a punishable offense. Surely you know how this looks, yes?”

You paused. Thoughts ran through your head a million miles per hour. What were you supposed to do? You could deny it, but he had strict evidence against you. You shakily lowered your gaze from him. 

“Does The King know?” You asked in voice barely above a whisper.

“He was the first one to find out.” The blonde spoke. 

Silence.

“What’re you going to do with me?”

“The King has already decided your fate. I’m sure you can infer what.”

Of course you could. That wretched man that you were forced to call your king had an insecurity complex.

“Treason.” You whispered. “He’s going to hang me for treason, is that it?” You said spat.

The man didn’t respond.

“Don’t I have a right to a trial or something?” 

“The King already thinks you're a traitor. You and I both know that’s enough for him to grant the death penalty.”

Silence.

“If that comes to pass or not rest entirely on you, [Name].” He said after a while. His tall figure moved closer to your cell, wrapping his gloved hand around one of the bars. Now that he was up close, it was clear how much he really towered over you. 

“As the head Commander, I have personal standing with the king. From the looks of it, you have made contact with rogue dragons. I have little doubt that you have seen much of the outside walls.”

You looked at him through your lashes. The subtle light of the amber flames illuminated the side of his face, making him look somehow more intimidating than he already was.

“We can help eachother out.”

“And how would you go about that?”

“Who is Marco? Where was he leading you to?”

You gave him a look of incredulity. For some reason, you felt an overwhelming urge to hide Marco’s identity. This man was military. Untrustable. Not to mention if the King considered this man to be one of his lackeys, this man was no one you wanted to be associated with.

“I-I just remember Marco. I don’t remember the rest.” You gritted out.

The man narrowed his eyes.

“Where did you get those burns? Have you had any contact with a Rogue Dragon?”

“I don’t know. I don’t remember.”

“Have you had any contact with titans?”

“I don’t remember.”

“Why did you leave the walls in the first place?”

“I said I don’t remember didn’t I?” You snapped.

The man gave you an intense look for a couple of seconds before taking a step back form the cell.

“Are your secrets so important you are willing to hang for them?”

You didn’t respond.

A couple of seconds passed. “Fine. So be it.” The man finally said. You heard the gravel groan under his bots as he turned on his heel. You heard his heavy footsteps retreat until they eventually disappeared behind the opening and closing of a door.

For the second time, you were alone.


	2. 2 - BLEAK

CHAPTER TWO - BLEAK

“Something still confuses me, Erwin.”

The gravelly voice of The King cut The Commander off. The blonde haired man paused, lowering the document in his gloved hand. He was in the middle of giving a report on what was seen on the recent expedition, even though he had spent sleepless nights compiling it. However, he knew better than to object. He met the King’s gaze. The monarch’s icy irises clashed with Erwin’s. He didn’t react when he felt the air get colder and much more hostile.

He simply dropped to one knee, placing his hand over his chest. The Commander lowered his gaze, unwilling to go through the toture of looking his King in the eye.

“I will try to answer whatever is perplexing you to the best of my ability, my liege.” He replied almost too robotically.

The King paused for a second.

“The girl,” He started.

[Name]. The girl who emerged from the lake. Erwin had become familiar with his rather crude terminology for her. He would never voice his opinion on it, though. He waited for The King to finish speaking.

“One can only exit the walls through military sanction, yes?”

“Yes.”

“How then, was that girl able to leave the walls?” The monarch asked, his tone harsh and uncaring.

Erwin’s boots suddenly became the most interesting thing in the world. His hand unconsciously curled around the report. [Name] hadn’t told him that either. In fact, she had a talent for avoiding his questions. She hid not-so-cleverly behind her common responses of “I don’t know” and “I don’t remember”. It was rather frustrating. He was certain that she had gone missing in the middle of the war. Did she not understand how dire the information she holds would be?

“Well?” The King asked, pulling The Commander out of his thoughts. The blonde man clenched his jaw, tilting his head slightly to the side.

“...I don’t know, my lord. It seems she’s an amnesiac.”

A chuckle stained the air after his response as if he was anticipating the answer. The chuckle itself wasn’t a pleasant sound. It was wretched and twisted, something straight out of a child’s nightmare. Hell, even Erwin had a chill run down his spine.

“You don’t know.” The King echoed. “Erwin, It’s strange that I’ve put a considerable amount of money into an organization that you don’t know about.” An unspoken threat lingered behind his words. Erwin understood perfectly, and he abhorred that he did.

“I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all, Erwin.”

“My apologies, my lord. The Survey Corps is working diligently to--”

“The sword shouldn’t be spared on anyone. I want the bitch dead. Hang her. Behead her. Feed her to the dragons, for all I care. I won’t have her start any uprisings or rebellions.”

Erwin’s eyebrows furrowed as his neutral gaze twisted into a dark glare. As difficult as the [hair color] haired girl was, he knew if he could somehow break through that untrusting scrutiny, the information she might hold could be revolutionary for the war. The way the King was talking, it almost seemed like he cared more about his reign over the empire than the war itself. Erwin blinked to himself.

“With all due respect, my lord, she could have the vital information that the Corps has been looking for in regard to physical repression and rogue dragons. Perhaps, even the titans themselves.”

The King paused. Erwin could feel the burning glare of the monarch on him.

“Is that so?” He said finally in a condescending tone. Erwin suppressed the spark of irritation in his chest.

“Indeed. We don’t need that much time. All I ask is--”

“Are you questioning me, Smith?”

Erwin clenched his jaw once again before answering in a smooth tone. “I wouldn’t dream of it, sire.”

“I would hope so. In case you forgot, I am your King. My word is your law. Even beyond that, I own you. Or have you forgotten?”

Erwin’s dark eyes glanced at his right arm. His beating heart felt strangely loud in his ears. He felt the cool metal sit against his shoulder, taunting him. Reminding him that his life wasn’t his own.

“...Of course not, sire.”

Erwin couldn’t see The King, but he could tell that hellish smirk was on his face.

“Good. It would serve you well to remember that.”

Erwin didn’t respond.

“I want her dead by the end of the week.”

That spark of irritation came back as a flame in his chest. He gave a rehearsed smile to The King. It wouldn’t be the first time his life had been threatened, nor did he doubt it would be the last.

“As you wish, my lord.”

With that, Erwin walked out of the presence of the monarch, ignoring the piercing glare burning at his back.

*****

_The cool breeze served as a well needed comforter against the flushed skin of your cheeks. Heavy breaths entered and left your dry lips at a steady pace bringing you a sense of odd security. The pulsing beat of your heart rang loud in your ears, much like bells. You swallowed a wad of saliva in an effort to soothe your dehydrated throat._

_“Are we there yet?” A feminine voice said from behind you. You rolled your eyes. “No.” You deadpanned. “Now stop asking.” You snapped._

_You heard the comforting laugh of Marco from in front of you. His tall stature hiked through the twisted tree trunks of the forest. He turned to face you, the sweat from his tanned skin glistening in the sinking sun._

_“Now, [Name]. Be nice, she’s your little sister now.” He teased. You stuck your tongue out at him. “Little sister my ass,” You replied. “Little brat is more like it!” You declared, grabbing the little girl behind you in a bear hug. Her shrill laughter rang in your ears like bells. Someone clicked their tongue from beside you._

_“Hey, can you knock that off? You’re going to attract titans.”_

_“Fuck off.” She said suddenly, causing you to laugh out loud and Marco to turn. He whipped his head towards you so fast you wondered if he had gotten whiplash. His cheeks burned. “[Name]! What in the name of Rose are you teaching her?”_

_You smirked at him. You opened your mouth to reply with something snarky when a ground shaking roar ripped violently through the air. The sound was guttural, but also predatory. All of you froze._

_Slowly, you turned around._

Your eyes fluttered open.

You had just experienced yet another daydream--or dream, you couldn't quite tell the difference anymore. Marco’s face and voice haunted your unconscious state, as if your brain wanted to make sure you never forgot him. There were new people in the dream this time, though. A little girl and someone else. You knew you would strain your mind if you tried to remember what they looked like. They felt familiar, though. They felt like home. You shook your head of the dream before shifting in your cot. White hot pain struck through your side when you accidentally leaned your weight on the wrong side of your body. You hissed, your hand flying to your wound. You cursed yourself. ‘Thanks burn, I knew I had been pain free for a while.’ You thought bitterly. You let out a pained grunt before pushing yourself up.

Much to your pleasant surprise (note the sarcasm) , the commander from before was already outside your cell. You suppressed your reflex to justo in surprise. His azure gaze cut through the dim candlelight. It was the first time you had seen him in three days. You assumed that he had given up on you. He was in the same black and red uniform as the day you last saw him, just without the cape. Still devastatingly handsome. Still devastatingly intimidating.

You broke your gaze away from his in order to behold what he held in his hand. You determined from the size and shape of the object that it was a first aid kit. You raised your eyebrow at this.

“You have no problem with the notion that The King will hang me soon, but you feel the need to treat my wounds?” You asked him. The blonde man walked towards your cell, the jangle of keys echoing in the room.

“He can’t hang you if you're already dead and gone from sepsis.” He replied. His voice was stronger and held much more confidence than yours. You wondered if it was because you had been rotting away in the cell or it was just a part of who The Commander was.

“How sweet of him.” You said in a sour tone, narrowing your eyes at nothing in particular. The cell door came open with a creak. Wordlessly, Erwin stepped into your cell. The sound of his boots against the concrete floor seemed to get louder and louder as he neared you. He closed the cell door behind him before walking up to your cot. It was odd, in your opinion. Did he not feel the need to restrain you? Besides your already chained wrists, of course, you had a decent range of motion. He wasn’t going to tie you down so you don’t attack him? Not that you were complaining, but why was he acting like you weren’t sentenced to death for treason?

“You aren’t going to restrain me?” You voiced, daring to look back up at his face. Why did he always seem to get taller? His presence was daunting enough.

To your surprise, the man lowered himself so he was on his knees in front of you.

“I have no need to.” He said simply, opening the bag in his hand and confirming that it was in fact a first aid kit.

“You don’t see me as a threat?’

“Not at all.” He said. You wanted to be angry at him, but he was right. You were in no shape to be picking a fight with anyone. Especially with a trained military commander. “I need to have access to your burns, if you don’t mind.”

You eyed him for a couple of moments. You didn’t know how you felt about baring the most vulnerable parts of your body to him. You wet your dry lips before hesitantly tossing the thin blanket over your legs, careful not to irritate the burns on your palms. No one had brought you a change of clothes, so you were still in the oversized button up and slacks. You scooted until you were at the edge of the cot facing him.

You shakily held an injured hand towards the blonde man. The bandages were worn, blood seeping through them. You cringed at the sight.

Erwin moved closer to you, inspecting the tattered bandages. You flinched slightly as his larger, gloved hands took yours. His touch was light, like he was holding a piece of fine china. He worked slowly but diligently to remove the bandages.

You glanced down at him, taking notice of the way his silk spun strands looked almost golden in the low candle light. You eyed his broad shoulders and arms, briefly wondering how long it took to get his physique to look so fit. He smelled good, too. It wasn’t that hard to catch his scent with how close he was to you. He smelled of soap and some other masculine scent you didn’t have the patience to figure out. Normally military men didn’t smell as good.

‘ _He’s the enemy, [Name]. You shouldn’t be fangirling over his fucking scent.’_

You shook your head in an attempt to rid yourself of your conflicting thoughts, earning you a look from Erwin.

You blinked back.

“Why are you here?” You said without thinking.

“If you do want to die of sepsis, please let me know. It would save me a lot of energy.” The light haired man responded with a quirk of his thick eyebrow. He succeeded in removing the bandages, only to reveal the burnt and bloody flesh you called your palms, some of which stuck to the bandages. A twinge of pain hit you as he removed it completely. The cool air on the exposed tissue made the wound itself feel vulnerable. You found yourself missing the restricting cover of the bandage, even if it was dirty and mildly uncomfortable. You frowned before your eyes found their way back to the man in front of you.

“That’s not what I meant.” You said again. “Why are you here specifically? Don’t you guys have medics and what not?”

Erwin pulled a roll of bandages out of the case, not bothering to look at you.

“Yes.” He said simply. You waited for him to continue.

You felt the seconds pass by without a sign of elaboration from the commander. Irritation blossomed in your chest.

“So then why did you come here?”

He didn’t respond, instead taking your smaller hand in his once more. He took out a tissue from the kit, dousing it in some clear liquid.

“This might sting. Forgive me.” He murmured. Erwin lowered the tissue on your burn. Immediately, you felt a sharp pain on your already hurting wounds. You hissed, attempting to pull your hand from his to alleviate yourself from the stinging. The Commander, however, was fast to hold your hand in a firm grip. You glared at him.

“I think we both know why it’s me here instead of a medic.” He said after a few moments. He looked up at you, his cerulean eyes irises cutting into your own [eye color] ones.

“You’re here to see if I could remember anything, is that it?”

“You remember enough. I would appreciate it if you were honest with me, though.”

Erwin looked away, before dipping his fingers in what looked to be a small tub of ointment. He smeared it on his gloved digits with his thumb, spreading it evenly on his fingers. When he was finished, he ran his fingers over the damaged skin of your palms, gentle but firm. You winced.

“I don’t remember as much as you think I do.”

“But you remember more than what you’re letting on.” He rebutted.

“Aren’t you persistent.” You said in a sour tone.

“I’ve been commanded to make sure your execution happens before the end of the week. At most you have four days.”

You gritted your teeth. It wasn’t that you wanted to die or that you were looking forward to your own death. You were scared, believe it or not. Yet despite how you might’ve felt about dying, you had no reason to keep living. Marco and the others, whoever they are, were more than likely dead. There was no one here for you inside the walls. No one that you wanted to meet again, that is. Your freedom had been snatched away from you. You had been caught.

“Like I’ve said, Miss [Name], your life could be spared.” You looked at him. Your name sounded… different on his tongue.

“Even if it was, I would spend the rest of it in this cell. What’s the point?”

He glanced up at you.

“You’d be alive.”

“You seem to care more about my life than I do, Commander.”

A chuckle left his throat, spilling out of his lips. “I want to be able to end this war as soon as possible. Information pertaining to the titans, dragons, or any other creature that mankind has yet to discover is crucial. Forgive me if this comes off as crude, but I care about what you know, not particularly your life.” He wrapped the bandages around your hand, trapping the ointment and the tissue against your palm.

You blinked down at him as he moved to the other arm.

“You claim I’m needed for information, yet this whole time you have made no move to stop me if I tried to escape.”

“You won’t.”

“Is that so?” You challenged.

“Miss [Name], both of your hands have been badly burned. So has your side and leg. You also have a mild case of hypothermia. Not to offend you, but you are not a threat to me.”

“What if I’m just acting like I’m in pain and I have tolerance?” You didn’t. You were very much in pain. “What if I attacked you here and now and made off with the key? What would you do then?”

Erwin paused, lowering your hand before looking up at you. His face was completely stoic as those eyes of his refocused on you. It almost sent a chill down your spine.

“Would you like to find out?” He said in a low voice, his gaze unwavering.

You gulped, unconsciously leaning away from the man. What the hell was that? Why did he look at you so intensely? You snatched your gaze from his, your lap suddenly becoming the most interesting thing in the world.

Erwin resumed, removing the bandages on your hand.

“Even if, by some miracle from the walls, you were to somehow immobilize me, the rest of my soldiers are just outside the door. You wouldn’t make it far.”

“What if I could?”

“You seem awfully interested in ‘what if’s’ miss [Name]. However, I do ask that you watch your words.”

“It’s just a hypothetical, Commander. I mean, I would love to escape this place and make my way back outside the walls—“

“Treason and undermining direct orders from The King?” He chuckled. He blinked up towards you. “I’m starting to think you’re suicidal.”

You looked down at him, a slight frown touching your lips. “You underestimate me. Why are you so certain I would be caught? I’ve slipped away before.”

“And look how far you’ve gotten.”

You paused, speechless. He wrapped your damaged hand.

“How did you do it? Escape, I mean.”

You didn’t respond to him.

The man sighed before reaching towards your shirt. You flinched away from his outstretched hand. You knew he was only trying to get to the injury on your side, but he was already close and you didn’t trust him at all.

He looked between you and the edge of the shirt.

“...I wasn’t going to—“

“I know.” You murmured a bit too quickly. “That’s what they all say.”

You instead reached out and grabbed the bottom on your shirt, struggling to lift it in a way it didn’t cause you pain. Your skin puckered into goosebumps as your [skin color] stomach was exposed. The burn in question started right beneath your right breast and ended at the bottom of the curve of your waist. You didn’t know how you felt about baring your torso to a military personnel. You averted your eyes from the commander, cursing at your burning cheeks.

“Hurry up already.”

Erwin brought out a cloth from the case, pouring some of the clear solution in the cloth.

“Dragon burns leave behind acidic residue since they don’t emit regular flames.” The blonde man mused. “Your flesh here has been thoroughly corroded.”

You didn’t reply.

“What was the dragon like?” The man asked for the unpteenth time.

“You didn’t hear me the first time? Was I supposed to remember everything overnight?”

“Yes, I was hoping you would.” He glanced up at you a second. “Pardon me,” He murmured under his breath. There was a spokenless boundary crossed when his gloved hand on your lower waist. You tensed, feeling your body jump to alertness when the cloth of his gloves rested gently on your side. His large palm gripped your side lightly, as if you were a piece of glass. You gritted your teeth. Could he feel the way your heart was racing underneath his fingertips? He brought his other hand up to your side to clean your wound.

You hissed in pain as the cloth came in contact with the burn. “I already told you,” You gritted out.

“I don’t remember?” The man filled in for you, an uninterested tone in his deep voice.

“If you already knew the answer, why are you asking me?”

A silence coated the both of you. The air suddenly became tense. Your [dark/light] eyes looked down at him. You could tell he was getting irritated, not quite angry. His face might’ve been as stoic as a mime, but his eyes betrayed him. He looked at you as if you had insulted him deeply, but the rest of his face held no emotion. The look alone was enough to put you off.

“Do you know how many people have died in this war?” He asked in that deep voice of his, an icy tone hanging on the edge. You unconsciously gulped. “How many good men have I seen devoured or burned alive?”

It was barely a war. Humanity was losing drastically.

“Are you blaming the war, their deaths, on me too now?” You said lowly.

“Have you no shame? Humanity is fighting for their lives behind these damned walls, caged like lambs to the slaughter. Yet here you are, finding a way to survive in the outside world full of beasts for two whole months, yet unwilling to share what you know with the rest of us?”

You averted your eyes, ignoring the creeping feeling of shame and guilt sinking on your shoulders. What was wrong with him? What has humanity ever done for you, besides crush you every chance it’s gotten? Besides giving you a failure of a king?

_Cold palms rested on either side of your face. They had a distinct metallic smell to them. A familiar liquid dripped from the hands to your chin. You didn’t bother wiping it away. Your eyes wandered to the other side of the room, a small, mangled body in the dark, inky corner. You felt like throwing up. Suddenly, your head was jerked forward, your eyes catching a haunting pair of hazel orbs. “Don’t look, [Name].” Marco’s voice echoed in your ears. “Don’t look.”_

What has humanity done besides kill off the only person you ever gave a damn about?

He didn’t know a damn thing about you or what you have been through. How dare he?

“Look, blondie,” You spat. “I ain’t responsible for all of humanity. People are dying, tough shit. Life isn’t fair. But what I won’t stand for is being called selfish for finding my own way out of this hellhole--”

“No, you’re right, miss [Name]. You are selfish because you won’t tell us how you survived all this.” You started feeling a slight pressure on your side. You ignored the growing pain, glaring with all of your might at the man in front of you.

“I was found at the bottom of a fucking lake with hypothermia and dragon burns. I have no idea if my friends are dead or alive, does that sound like I was surviving to you?”

“We live in a world full of giant decaying humanoids and acidic fire breathing beasts and you’ve been found alive after two months outside of humanity's greatest defense. You were definitely surviving, don't be cute.” He growled, saying the last of his words between clenched teeth. Pain coursed through your nerves as the pressure increased but once again, you ignored it.

“Your king wants to hang me publically. Forgive me if i’m not in a sharing mood.” You snarled. Suddenly, the pain increased dramatically. You let out a sharp gasp of air, retracting your hands from your shirt to push him away from you. Your bandaged hands landed on his broad shoulders. You could feel the strong muscles under his button up, though you already knew he would be built. Though, something felt off. His shoulder somehow felt firmer, like she was pushing against... metal or something.

Erwin cleared his throat, removing his hands from you. His cloth was covered in blood and your side was burned, the throbbing increasing the pain. You cursed, your hands immediately flying to your side. He moved away from you, standing up to his full height.

“Forgive me, I got carried away.” He said after a while. He watched as you writhed in your bed, tears pricking behind your eyes. You glared at him.

“But know this, miss [Last Name], we will find out what you’re so desperate to hide.” He said, emotionlessly. “You will help humanity’s cause, whether you like it or not.”

You moaned in pain as you cursed at him. “You asshole!”

The man ignored you, picking up what remained of the first aid kit. “I’ve never been one for nursing.” He mused. “I’ll send a medic.” He turned his back to you. He opened your cell door, the creak seemingly taunting you.

“You’re running on borrowed time, miss [Name]. If I were you, I would consider my next actions very carefully.”


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3 - ALL FOR NOTHING**

  
  


**TIME SEEMED MALLEABLE AND NONEXISTENT AT** simultaneously. Before you left the walls, you used to be concerned about being caught--about being forced to be hung or rot in a jail cell. Well, now that you were facing both, you realized that your fears were extremely justified. You had learned from the lack of sounds from other inmates that you were in a single-celled room. A roo, that you were sure soldiers were told not to enter as you hadn’t seen another person in--well, since you’ve last seen the commander. Heavens knows when that was. There was no one to talk to, no one to share your frustrations. You were alone in every sense of the word, and  _ walls,  _ the silence was so loud. It surrounded you and suffocated you. Hell, sometimes you would make your own noises just to break the unyielding stillness.

However, it wasn’t all bad. You would be lying if you had said that you were cursed the whole duration of your stay. The truth was, you were unconscious most of the time. It was a never-ending cycle between sleep and wake for you. You dozed off at the sound of Marco’s boyish voice. You snapped awake to the sound of thunder like footsteps and loud growling. It felt like your subconscious was trying to get you to realize or remember something, but something was blocking it. It irritated you to no end. 

You poked your mushy dinner from yesterday--or the last time you woke up, it was hard to tell. Sometimes when you woke up, there was a small tray of bread and watery mashed potatoes sitting right by the bars of your cell. Of course, they had only decided to feed you twice during the time you had been in captivity, including the “meal” you were given at the moment. It smelled disgusting and you knew your stomach was going to hurt by the time you finished, but bad food was better than no food.

You pushed the tray away, forcing yourself to swallow the remainder of the bread. At least when the king decided to execute you, you wouldn't have to eat this shit anymore.

You got up wobbly making your way back to your cot. You winced, your right thigh throbbing with every step you took. Oh right, that bastard of a commander never did send another medic for you. Most of the time you would wake up with blood running leaking through your bandages and pants. You couldn't even rip up your pants or anything else to make a crappy bandage since your palms were injured. 

You fell on the hard mattress, laughing bitterly.

“I should’ve drowned in that fucking lake.” You rasped out. 

“I think so too.” A voice came from the door to the room. You slowly lifted your head towards the exit. It was an unfamiliar voice. Anxiety grew in your stomach as your eyes landed on three soldiers. You had never seen them a day in your life. One was blonde, with a thick beard. Another was bald and older looking while the last had reddish hair, pulled back in a bun.

You glared at them. Who were they? Why were they coming to you alone? What were they planning to do? Worst-case scenarios flew through your head as the bald one stepped forward.

“Who are you?” You asked lowly. The three of them looked at you like you were the worst thing to plague the earth. 

“Get up and put your hands where I can see them,” Baldie said harshly, ignoring your question.

The feeling in your stomach intensified. You tried your best to look bothered as you wet your dry lips.

“Is it my time to get executed?” You asked with a cruel smile on your face. You hadn’t realized four days had passed you already. Damnit, you hated this. You hated everything. This wasn’t fair--

“Unfortunately for humanity, no. You hang tomorrow.” The older looking one spoke up, disgust prevalent in his voice. You looked at him. Why were they treating you like you were a titan yourself? You shook off the piercing glares from the men.

“If you’re not here to hang me, what are you here for?”

“Prisoners usually like to take their own lives to save themselves the embarrassment of hanging. The King doesn’t like that.” The red-haired man answered.

“Fuckin’ lunatic.” You muttered under your breath. 

Before you could register what happened to you, The older man stormed across the room, harshly unlocking your cell door. You looked at him in confusion before his quick, threatening steps were in front of you. Suddenly, a blunt pain exploded on the left side of your face. You yelped in surprise and pain, falling off the cot. A more searing pain blossomed The chains held your hands up, comically. 

“You dumb bitch! Have you no respect for The King?!” The man spat, spittle flying out of his mouth as his worn features twisted in rage.

You didn’t move, too stunned by the fact that this man  _ hit you _ . Sure, it wasn’t the first time a man--or woman--had laid their hands on you, but it was so unexpected. You had forgotten how indoctrinated the King’s subjects were. 

You gritted your teeth together before turning your head back to the man. Your eyes burned with hate.

“Fuck you,” You spat harshly.

This infuriated the man even more, as his face turned bright red.

“You little--” You flinched, raising your arms to protect the blow that was inevitably coming. 

“Don’t waste your time on her, Herl. I’m not getting stable duty because of you.” The voice of the redhead spoke. You looked up to see him holding Baldy back by his shoulders. The bald man grimaced before snatching himself out of Redhead’s grip.

The man grumbled and walked behind you. He unlocked your chains from the wall. Before you could get a chance to make your dashing escape, meaty fingers grabbed a fistful of your hair. You yelped in pain, your burned hands flying up to your scalp.

The man grumbled angrily as he dragged you just outside your cell.

“Get the fuck up!” He snapped, causing you to shakily rise to your feet. The pain in your thigh increased significantly as you put weight on it. As in insult to injury, you could feel the black slacks slipping from your waist. Your face burned in humiliation as tears pricked behind your eyes. This was a nightmare. 

The man removed his hands from your tangled strands. He stood next to you, holding the end of your chains. The redhead and the blonde went into your cell, starting their search.

You watched on in burning hatred. However, it wasn’t long until that fire fizzled out into embers. You lowered your eyes in defeat, cursing as a tear fell down your bruised cheeks.  _ This  _ was supposed to be the survey corps? The esteemed, oh-so-prestigious military? These people were no more than bullies—or a gang would be more appropriate. They seemed stuck in their cultish beliefs about the king—as if he was infallible or something! You couldn’t understand it. He was a man like the rest of you. A wicked one at that. They should know more than anybody the King does not care for his people.

Your eyebrows furrowed. So what, you were supposed to lay down and let this happen? Would it even be a good idea to fight back? You were being executed tomorrow. The thought of death still terrified you. After all these years. After it had stared you in the face multiple times. You let out a soft sigh, feeling another drop of water well out from behind your [eye color] eyes. Maybe it was for the best. What type of world was this? It wasn’t worth living if you were going to be treated like this. 

Humanity was selfish. The hearts of man had grown cold. You included. You let your eyes flutter shut, silently accepting your face.

_ “[Name]!” _ The familiar voice I’m of Marco echoed in your brain. You inwardly chuckled bitterly. Why did your brain never let you forget him? He was most likely dead anyway.

_ Dead. _

That word besides Marco’s name sounded odd. It sounded sick and unnatural like it didn’t belong there. His boyish face flashed in your mind again.

  
  


Marco. Always the optimist, he was. You wondered what he would do in this situation. You opened your eyes again. Would he say some corny joke? Assure you that everything would be okay?

You needed to find him. You needed to escape these hellish walls and find him and the rest—whoever they were. They had to still be out there. 

You decided there and then that you would escape the walls. That, or you would die trying.

Your [eye colored] eyes glided towards the man who had dragged you out of your cell. There wasn’t much you could do to disarm him. He was tall, much like The Commander, if not, probably a few inches shorter. His build was stocky, but you could tell he had muscle on him. Your eyes dropped down to his loosely clenched hands that held the end of your chains. He was unsuspecting. His worn eyes looked uninterested as well, lazily watching something to the far right of the both of you.

You felt your heartbeat increase in your ears. This was your chance.

You let out a shallow breath before slowly lifting your hands. With the speed of a cobra, you wrapped the chains around his throat. The man let out a soundless yelp, his hands scratching at his neck. You pulled the chain around his neck harder, nearly jumping for joy when his knees buckled. You held the man to your chest, pulling against the chain as hard as you could. You didn’t want to kill him—although if he did die you wouldn’t be bothered much by it—you just wanted to disarm him.

The man’s mouth was trapped in a soundless scream, reaching desperately for his buddies. The other soldiers on the other hand had their backs turned to the two, engaging in small talk as they checked the cell. You saw the consciousness in his eyes fading. Your lips twitched upwards in what could be called a smirk. You lowered your lips to his ear.

“Who’s the bitch now?”

The man looked at you with fear and panic before his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he passed out. Your head snapped back up to the two other guards. They still hadn’t noticed. 

Slowly, you lowered the man onto the floor. You set him down gently before tip-toeing to the exit.

Your hands wrapped around the cool handle of the door. Your heart was racing.  _ Please, _ you pleaded to no one in particular.  _ Please be open _ .

The walls seemed to have heard your prayers as the cool draft from the outside hit your arm as you opened the door. 

You contained the urge to jump for joy as you tiptoed out. As soon as the door was closed quietly behind you, you began to sprint down the hallway.

“Holy shit!”

You had no idea where you were or where you were going, for that matter. All that mattered to you is that you were free. You sprinted with a limp, though from the outside, the most appropriate thing to say you were doing was hobbling. The rhythmic sound of the soles of your feet was music to your ears.

Your eyes scanned the area. You heard faint voices in the near distance. You gritted your teeth, slowing your pace. If you were to get caught, there would be no doubt that you would get executed right there on the spot. You gradually came to a stop in the middle of the hallway, relieving your throbbing leg and your empty lungs. You took in a few shaky breaths as you heard the voices in the distance get closer. 

“Shit.”

You cursed, hobbling back a few steps. This was a bad idea. Walls, why do you always make such rash decisions? Panic settled into your bloodstreams as footsteps-- lots of them-- neared you. ‘ _ Think, [Name!]’ _ you screamed at yourself. You ignored the sound of your heartbeat beating in your ears. Should you take one of them hostage and demand to be set free? You furrowed your brows. No, of course not! The king would have both of you killed. Plus, in the shape you were in, it was a fat chance you could hold anyone hostage. The only reason you got the guard was that he wasn’t paying attention to you. Plus, he was close. You shook your head. Maybe the best course of action was to go back to your cell--

“YOU LITTLE BITCH! WHERE DID YOU GO?” The familiar voices of one of the guards roared from behind you. You looked towards them, mortified. That was extremely quick. The two guards were running at you, red-faced and furious. You yelped, abandoning your train of thought, and sprinted forward, towards the group of voices. You quickly rounded the corner, coming face to face with the owners of the voices.

The pair of soldiers sported surprised looks, one of them even jumping back due to shock. Dread filled your stomach as you stopped momentarily.

“Are you men daft?! Catch the bitch!” You heard the redhead's voice scream. Their voices sounded way closer than before. As if his voice snapped you out of your trance, you sprinted past the startled soldiers, narrowly escaping their attempts to grab you. The intense pain in your thigh seemed to disintegrate as adrenaline pumped through your veins.

_ Just until you reach the walls! _ You thought to yourself desperately, hearing the footsteps behind you get louder and louder. You didn’t dare turn around. You turned another corner. Your eyes grew when they landed on the staircase leading upwards. You were below the ground? Forget that, how were you going to climb the stairs? Your legs were screaming at you, and you were positive your wound had re-opened. You gritted your teeth. You couldn’t let this stop you! You had to leave the walls. You needed to find Marco. 

Wiping the tears from your eyes, you ran towards the staircase, hobbling as fast as you could up the steps. You screamed out in agony as your leg pushed your body up.

“There she is! Get her! You’d all be hanged if you let an injured girl outrun you!”

You were halfway up the stairs when you felt a muscular arm snake around your waist. You let out a strangled gasp as you reached towards the door.

“Get off me!” You screamed in a hoarse voice. The soldier behind you didn’t relent.

“When we get back to your cell, break both of your legs. How will you run away then you fucking rat?” The scraggly voice of the blonde whispered harshly in your ear. A chill went up to your spine before you wiggled one of your arms free, elbowing him in the jaw. The man let out a strangled grunt, loosening his grip on your waist. Not wasting any time, you quickly pushed him back. The man stumbled before falling down the stairs, crashing into his fellow soldiers who were rushing to his aid. You didn’t have time to watch them all tumble down the stairs. You whipped back around pushing open the exit.

To your immediate disappointment, the door didn’t lead to the outside, rather another building entirely. Your eyebrows furrowed as you limped upwards, closing the door behind you. Breathing heavily, you finally stopped running. Your leg felt like it was on fire. You were certain you needed medical help. You shook your head, pushing your back off the door. The soldiers could burst through the door at any moment. You needed to get as far away as possible. Crap, how did you escape the walls in the first place?

You limped down the hallway as fast as you could. You couldn't run anymore due to one, the increasing pain in your leg, and two, the fact that you were actually exhausted. You took in the environment around you. Large windows were placed on the walls of the hallway, illuminating it. It was midday and rather cloudy as if it was about to rain. You took a peek in passing, your eyebrows raising as you caught a glimpse of the soldiers training outside. The blonde commander wasn’t with them, at least as far as your three-second observation told you. 

You quickly looked away.

In the near distance, you could see the walls. They were just as tall and intimidating as you remembered. It felt strange, somehow, looking at them again. 

“Focus.” You whispered to yourself, tearing your gaze away from the windows. You turned another corner, only to be faced with two opposing hallways. You looked between the two, your brain filling up with possible outcomes of each direction. 

Maybe if you weren’t so occupied, you would’ve seen it coming.

A feeling of intense sorrow and anguish hit your body like a rushing train. You froze in shock. Tears fell down your cheeks without permission and your body began to tremble. You looked down at your shaking hands. What was going on? Why were you crying? Why were you trembling?

Your body again acted without your permission, jerking to the left, and towards the stairs. Your eyes widened as you tried to restrain your movements to no avail. You yelps as your legs move suddenly, all pain seemingly vanishing from your thigh. Were you under a spell of some sort? What was happening?

You flew down the stairs involuntarily, sometimes skipping whole steps in your attempt to reach wherever your body was leading you. The feeling of sorrow only increased as you were led down the hallway. You made multiple sharp turns and twists until you reached a particular part of the building. The ceiling was high with wide doors. 

Much like you were merely a puppet on a string, your hand jutted out, grabbing the large door to your right. You pushed open the door, coming face to face with a cluster of soldiers. They had their backs turned to you, their attention captured on something in front of them.

You heard the deep voice of the commander resonate throughout the room. Dread built up in your stomach, and this time it was actually genuine. Your body pushed through the sea of black-clad soldiers. The tears were falling at a much faster rate, damn near retching a sob from your throat. 

You eventually saw the back of Erwin, who was at the front of the cluster. Finally, your eyes landed on the object of everyone’s attention.

A large creature sat, or rather,  _ laid, _ miserably at the far end of the room. Was this what a dragon looked like? You’d never thought you would live to see one in your lifetime. Its scales were soft blue that covered the entirety of the winged reptile’s body. The coat of scales looked dull, somehow, much unlike the valiant color you’ve heard throughout the years. A set of sharp spike-like bones ran down its long neck and body, getting progressively larger as it went. The animal looked starved. The ribs jutted out from the side of the animal. It’s long and powerful tail wrapped around itself loosely, and it’s chin laid sorely against the concrete floors. The dragon had tired golden eyes that almost immediately rolled to you.

_ Walls have mercy, _ You thought, astonished. 

Your body jerked forward, only to be held back by the commander's arm. He wasn’t facing towards you at all, instead of analyzing the blue beast.

“Stand back, soldier.” He said, almost robotically. You involuntarily sniffed loudly, causing Erwin’s piercing eyes to land on you. Immediately, his eyebrows furrowed. The man opened his mouth to speak (or command someone to grab you) when you suddenly pushed past him.

The Alchemist, Hange, slowly stopped speaking as she watched you stumble towards the dragon. Her arms lowered as she looked towards the Commander, confusingly. 

“Are you fucking crazy? Do you know how dangerous what you’re doing is?” You heard another soldier yell out. 

“Someone stop her!”

“Does the bitch have a deathwish?”

Your body refused to listen as you took more labored steps forward.

Erwin watched in odd curiosity as you walked. The concerned and angry yells of his comrades sounded around him, desperately trying to get the girl to get away from certain death. Oddly enough, the exact way she escaped from the cell was far from his train of thought.

“Tch,” Levi’s irritated voice sounded from next to him. “No wonder she was found at the bottom of a damn lake, the girl is dumb as rocks.” The shorter man’s hands flew to his blades. His glare on the woman’s figure deepened as he took a step towards her. Erwin’s arm held him back before he could do anything to retrieve her.

The dark-haired man’s eyes widened by millimeters before he turned to The Commander. Erwin didn’t move his gaze from your form. 

“Commander, if she dies before the execution, The King will have our heads.” The man reasoned, gripping his blades tighter.

The blonde-haired man was quiet for a couple of seconds. “If she doesn’t die, then something greater might come out from this.” 

Levi clicked his tongue, glancing at the woman again. She was getting so close to the dragon. There was no doubt that it was vengeful due to the manor Hange had abducted it. She was walking straight to her grave. Had she no sense of self-preservation?

“This is not the time for one of your shitty gambles, Erwin.”

The man in question didn’t react. “The dragon had been staring at her since she stepped in. It looked different somehow… more alive.” The man concluded. “Almost like it was relieved to see her.”

“Stand down!” He bellowed at the other soldiers.

Levi looked at The Commander. His curiosity knew no bounds. Neither did his observational skills. Levi couldn’t tell which one was more dangerous.

  
  


Your stride towards the beast became less strained as you gave up the will to fight back. You were less than five feet away from the dragon now.

It looked way bigger and scarier up close.

  
  


Those reptilian slits glared down at you. You were gripped in fear. Could it see you trembling in its presence? Was this the last thing you would see before dying? You cursed inwardly. What a shitty way to die. There were noticeable bags under its eyes, something you didn’t know dragons could get. 

Finally, the pull of your body ceased. The winged creature was right in front of you now. You were sobbing at this point and you still didn’t know why. Your eyes strained. You were producing so many tears  _ it hurt. _ Confusion, humiliation, and morbid curiosity swirled inside the pits of your stomach.

Had the dragon led you here? 

You had never heard of a dragon having weird puppeteer abilities.

You nearly jumped out of your skin when smoke started to spill out of the nostrils of the beast. You gulped. You were held down in place. Even if you wanted to run, you couldn’t move. The smoke felt like a bad sign.

Before you had a chance to stop yourself, your hand moved on its own. Shakily, you held out your hand towards the creature. The Dragon glared at the appendage, narrowing its eyes menacingly. Your fingertips soon made contact with its snout. Immediately, though your palms that had been bandaged, a feeling akin to sparks made itself known underneath your jarred fingertips. It was an odd feeling, yet it didn’t hurt in the slightest.

The dragon opened its mouth ever so slightly, allowing steam to hail from its throat. You didn’t move as the gust of air pushed past you, forcing your [hair type] backward. This wretched a reaction from the soldiers.

Oh, right. The whole survey corps was watching you. You wondered why you hadn’t been struck down yet.

The blue beast then dropped its head, as if it had run out of energy. It blinked at you slowly before its eyes closed shut.

In that moment, multiple negative feelings hit you at once. The first was dread. The feeling was sharp and cold, making you worry if your next breath might be your last. The next was desperation. It was the need to leave the building, but your arms and legs feeling too heavy to move. Finally, the crushing pang of hunger swelled in your stomach. You felt nauseated. Like you had eaten something that wasn’t meant to be eaten. Your other hand flew to your mouth in order to prevent yourself from retching.

You looked back up at the dragon. It’s dark eyes reflected those very emotions.

Memories that didn’t seem to be yours flashed through your brain.

An ensnared blue dragon, panicking and desperate.

A dead lamb that was chucked in front of you.  _ That wouldn’t be nearly enough. _

The feeling of your bones gradually growing weaker and weaker from the lack of sunlight.

Then, it finally hit you.

“These are your memories, aren’t they?” You whispered to the beast. Your eyes were wide. When had you stopped sobbing?  _ ‘Have I gone mad?’ _ You reasoned within yourself. “These tears, this hunger, this is what you’re feeling?”

  
  


The dragon could do nothing but blink groggily at you. Your fingertips trembled as your hand slid off the beast’s snout.

You shakily turned to face your audience.

“I wouldn’t make any sudden moves if I were you!” You heard Hange’s voice call out. Your eyes widened as you registered what your situation was.

A plethora of swords surrounded you in a half-circle. They were mere inches away from your being. They stood rigid in the air, sharp and ready to attack. One, in particular, was aimed at your throat. Your heart hammered in your throat.

‘ _ How were they—?’ _

You shakily tore your gaze away from the weapons and looked at the brown-haired woman. She had a stern look on her face, but that’s not what caught your attention. Her arm was up in the air. Her white gloves were long gone, at least on the hand that was up. Crimson blood seeped from the newly caused wound on her palm, leaking down onto her sleeve.

About seven other soldiers stood next to the woman. All had at least one of their gloves off and their hands out rather than up. You gritted your teeth as a drop of blood dripped from one of the swords.

How could you forget? 

Alchemy.

“This is an interesting turn of events,” Hange called out, a grip teasing her lips. “While I am curious in regards to your escape, I’m going to have to ask you to stay put!”

You gave the alchemist a look of obvious faux confidence before turning your gaze to the Commander. As always, he was calm and collected. His thick eyebrows were furrowed as he tilted your head in what you could perceive as being deep in thought.

The dragon huffed behind you, dragging you out of your thoughts.

“What—“ You cut yourself off, visibly cringing at the sound of your nervous and cracked voice. You cleared your throat before starting again.

“What have you been feeding her?” You called out to the soldiers. You saw their faces change in confusion as they began murmuring to themselves.

“You’re inches away from death. If I were you I would be worried about myself more than the beast.” You heard the uncaring voice of Levi call back. His narrowed eyes glared at you.

You gulped at his tone, glancing back at the dragon. Her tired eyes were focused on the soldiers in front of her, giving you little encouragement. You turned back, acutely noticing that the swords had edged closer.

“She’s starving!” You tried again.

Erwin walked up to the front of the crowd and a few inches in front of Hange.

“Lambs.” He replied in a blank tone. “Pigs. Sometimes, horses.” He narrowed his eyes at you. “Miss [ Name], what is the meaning of this?”

You ignored his question. 

“You’re not feeding her nearly enough. You only give her one serving a day! You’re starving her!”

  
  


The taller man didn’t react in the slightest.

“That’s right.”

Your eyes widened at his words.  _ ‘That’s right?’ _ You thought incredulously. ‘ _ How cruel are these people?’ _ The blonde picked up on your expression.

“We barely have enough food in the walls to feed humanity, miss [Name]. Not to talk of a dragon.”

“Then what is the reason for kidnapping her from the wild? Not to mention the absolute havoc the lack of sunlight is doing on her bones—“

“Step away from the dragon.”

“I won’t!” You called back, the dragon backing you with a huff. Why were you so worked up? You looked a fool, you knew it. You had never seen the dragon—or any dragon for that matter— before a day in your life, yet somehow you felt connected to it. Bonded. Like you were the only way her anguish could be made known. You fervently wiped the tears from your eyes.

“She’s not some inanimate object you can do what you please with! She has a mind, with feelings! She can feel everything you’re doing to her!”

Erwin didn’t reply for a few seconds.

“If what we give her isn’t enough to sustain the beast’s life, so be it. Its death will advance humanity by dissection.”

“Do you hear yourself?!-“

“Clearly, you have very strong views about the dragon. However, I’m going to need you to step away before we have to use force.”

You stilled at the thinly veiled threat. You took a hesitant step backward, suddenly uncomfortable being the object of Erwin's gaze. 

In your nervous stupor, you backed up into the dragon who only nudged you forward. You nearly jumped out of your skin at the movement.

_ Go _ , her worn eyes seemed to echo.

You stiffly turned back to the blonde commander. His gaze hadn’t eased up.

Finally, after a short inner battle, you raised your hands in surrender.

*****

It went without saying that you were promptly brought back to your cell. Funnily enough, Baldie had still been there, lying unconscious, when you had been escorted back. It was a humorous sight.

The Commander, however, didn’t find it quite as funny. Since he was the one to personally escort you back, he was the first to see the unconscious man lying in the middle of the floor, purple bruises showing on his skin. The man ordered for your chains to be shortened. Much to your disapproval, you could barely step foot outside your cot without the cuffs pulling back on you.

“You are lucky The King didn’t hear about this.” The smooth yet authoritative voice of Erwin filled your senses. You looked up from your bandaged hands.

He was right outside your cell, leaning against the wall. His posture was mirrored from three days prior. The room seemed dimmer somehow, despite the candles burning bright in both corners of the room.

A soft smirk kissed your lips. 

“Shielding me from the King’s wrath again, Commander?” You asked, a teasing tone staining your words. “You have a crush on me or something?”

The taller blonde male didn’t react to your words. His face remained as stoic as usual.

“Miss [Last Name], do you know the position you are in right now?”

Your smirk slowly faded.

“I’m being executed tomorrow. The position I’m in hardly matters—“

“I should’ve seen this coming.” He gruffed.

“You are beyond reason, beyond any rationale.” The man pushed himself off the wall, narrowing his eyes at you.

“Hey!—“

“Do you know how many innocent lives you put in danger?”

You shut your mouth at his words, pressing your lips together.  _ Innocent? _ You mocked in your mind.  _ You’re military. You’re not innocent.  _

“For what?” He continued. “The chance to see a dragon up close?”

You bit the corner of your lip. “I was  _ trying _ to escape.”

He gave you a mocking smile that was anything but pleasant.

“Oh, you were trying to escape? Forgive me, that makes everything better.”

You glared at him. The man sighed, turning his back to you. A couple of moments went by.

“Perhaps execution  _ is _ the best path for you.” He said. “However there are other ways to make you talk. Surely the king won’t mind a scratch or two on you.” 

Something pulled in your chest at his cold tone. Execution. There was something so final and permanent about the word. You were embarrassed to admit it still scared you. But now, it seemed  _ real.  _ It seemed close. The fear of death loomed over you like a boogeyman to a child.

Erwin didn’t grant you another look before turning towards the door. You clenched your jaw. Your only means of escape—your only bargaining chip—was leaving you. Fear and adrenaline rushed through your veins with every step he took.

_ Wait,  _ you looked at the retreating figure of the man.  _ Please, wait..! _

The word clawed up your throat and forced its way on your tongue before you had a chance to contain yourself.

“Wait!” You called, your voice weak and cracked. 

The man didn’t turn around. Hell, he hardly reacted. Erwin turned the knob of the door.

“Wait! Please!” You wet your lips, ignoring the desperation that seeped into your voice. “I’ll tell you what I know!”

Finally, Erwin paused. With one foot outside the door at that. The man didn’t react immediately, rather a couple of seconds went by before you got any response.

“Pardon?”

You looked down at your hands in shame as he turned to look at you.

“All the other times you were threatened with death it didn’t phase you. Now that your execution is a mere night away you’re feeling generous?”

“Do you want to know or not?”

The man slowly stalked back in front of your cell.

“Why were you outside the walls?”

You chuckled pathetically.

“After every questionable thing I’ve done—“

“Answer the question, Miss [Name].”

You flinched slightly at his cold tone. You cleared your throat before daring to look up at him.

“There was no life left for me in the walls. If I stayed here, I would’ve starved to death—or worse—be killed. I wasn’t created to be kept in a cage.” You spoke lowly. It wasn’t the full truth, but apparently, it was enough for the commander.

“Certain death was more enticing than a safe but limited life?” He asked. He raised his brow. “What were you hoping to find?”

You paused. Now that he had brought it to your attention, it did seem odd. You didn’t have much of your memories, but you were sure you knew of the dangers leaving the walls. Your brows furrowed as you dogged through your frail memories.  _ Why _ of all places did you choose to leave the walls?

“Miss [Name]?” 

Erwin’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts.

“I don’t remember…” You said finally. The commander stared at you for a few seconds in uninterest before you realized what you sounded like. “I-It‘s true! I don’t know why I thought…” you trailed off, feeling shame wash over you.

“Are there people beyond the walls?”

The question caught you off guard. The man seemed to recognize this.

“Is there a civilization you were trying to reach?” You couldn’t miss the flicker of emotion in the man’s dark gaze as he asked of the supposed civilization. It was almost as if that was what he wanted to ask the entire time.

“I don’t know.” You spoke. “I remember Marco leading us somewhere. That’s all, I’m afraid.”

The man seemed dejected by this. Again, the change was subtle, but you caught it. 

He cleared his throat. “About the dragon.” He said, after a few moments of quiet. 

“I felt the dragon was pulling me—controlling me. Sure, it was forceful, but there was something personal about it.” You spoke, struggling to find your words. Your eyebrows knitted together even more.

“It was like she was using me as a mouthpiece.”

The taller blonde man looked at you, his eyes narrowing.

*****

“Telepathy?”

The bald man looked at Erwin, discontent and confusion in his matured features. “Erwin, have you gone mad?”

Erwin blinked at the man in front of him, ignoring the confused stares of his two comrades. Levi clicked his tongue and Hange stared on in interest.

“This is straight from her mouth. She said in I-quote, ‘It felt like she was using me as a mouthpiece.’” 

“The poor girl’s out of it.” The shorter ravenette commented, taking his eyes off the candle in the middle of the room momentarily. “She isn’t worth punishment from the King, Smith.”

“I’d have to agree with Pyxis and shorty on this one, Erwin.” The brown-haired woman spoke in a rare moment of seriousness. “We have no way of confirming what she’s saying is the truth.”

The commander clenched his jaw at this, silently. “She’s seen the outside walls, Pyxis. Lived in it. Even if she’s mad, surely there is some value in her words.”

The bald man, Pyxis, frowned deeply at his words, momentarily glancing at his arm. Erwin picked up on this immediately. The room suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if they were ignoring the elephant in the room.

“It has nothing to do with my father if that’s what you all are thinking.”

Hange visibly tensed at the words he spoke, looking away in what was undoubtedly guilt. Erwin ignored it.

Pyxis cleared his throat.

“You’re walking a dangerous path, commander Smith.” His grey eyes darkened.

“One that will eventually get you executed.”


End file.
